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All Together Now
The Beatles Talk Show
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John Lennon
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The Beatles Talk Show
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Welcome to The Beatles Talk Show!......
Here they are, THE BEATLES!!!......

-audience claps-

-camera pans over to the boys who are sitting in a half circle in four chairs-

Paul: Yes, welcome, welcome! Since today is the first show, we will be reading fan mail!

John: I thought we were doing that so the person would be watching and we wouldn't have to write back.

Paul: -through clenched teeth- Shh, Lennon.

George grabs a huge brown sack from behind the chair. Letters and boxes are falling out as he places it in front of them.

George: -clears throat- Okay, the first letter is from Tyronne in Brooklyn, New York. Tyronne writes:

Yo' muzak be the shiznit.

gangsta, Tyronne.

-George looks at the other confusedly. They just shrug their shoulders.-

Umm, okay Tyronne. Thanks for the lovely letter. Who's next, Rings?

-Ringo grabs a letter that has blood stains on the envelope-

Ringo: This letter is from Shineequa and Shenaynay of Harlem. They write:

You's be soo gangsta! We loves the way you sing about bitches an' ho's. Pleez write about us. That would be so trippin' yo'.

-Ringo raises eyebrow as he reads the letter-

Thank you Shineequa and Shenaynay. We'll get back to you on writing that song.

John: Why are all the fans writing these weird letters?

-Paul looks pointedly at the camera-

Paul: John Lennon did not mean to say that our fans are weird, nor did he imply that he is bigger than the fans, and/or Jesus Christ. Thank you.

-John shakes his head-

John: Paul, why do you always try to take matters into your own hands? That's Eppy's job!

-cuts to George-

George: Shout out to Eppy! Peace dawg!

-cuts back to the others, who give George a confused look-

Paul: -rolls eyes- Whatever.Let's open some of these packages.

John: Ohhh! Me first! -grabs package off of the floor-

This is from Pimp Master G to the Angster of Compton.

-John rips open box- -crack falls on floor-

John, George, and Ringo: CRACK!!

-they drop to the floor and start sniffing the crack-

Paul: Guys! Cut it out! They're not supposed to know that we're drug addicts!

-continue to sniff crack-

Paul: That's it. Sorry, but that's all for today, I'm Paul McCartney, hoping your friends aren't as weird as mine.

John: Paul, stop trying to do everything!

Paul: -sternly-  I don't do everything!

-credits roll-

CREDITS (typed by Paul McCartney)

Wardrobe provided by: Paul McCartney

Jewlery provided by: Ringo Starr

Furniture provided by: Paul McCartney

Letters provided by: fans

Fans provided by: Paul McCartney

Coffee made by: Paul McCartney

Paul McCartney made by: Jim and Mary McCartney

Other three Beatles controlled by: Paul McCartney

Paul McCartney controlled by: Paul McCartney

Floor installed by: Paul McCartney

Hosted by: Paul McCartney (and three of his friends)

Taser gun for controlling John Lennon provided by: Paul McCartney

This has been a Paul McCartney Inc. production.







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